SEC PROGRESS REPORT WEEK 11 – Saturday November 12, 2016 – election week edition, No Safe Spaces here - Saban declares himself Czar for life!!!!

Alabama grade = A+  Miississippi State grade = F                                                                                                          Mississippi State 3  Alabama 51 –  Run college students.  There is no “Safe Places” in Tuscaloosa.  It was quaint to even think The Maroon Dogs could show up and could play the anarchy game as was played on other campuses.  Saban has done what many Americans have feared those in power would perhaps do.  He has taken over completely and declared himself permanent czar of college football as we know it.

South Carolina grade =C   Florida grade = B (for Boring )                                                                                          South Carolina 7  Florida 21 – What if they played an SEC East (or Least) game and nobody cared which boring team would be designated the Hunger Games sacrifice for Bama at the Georgia Dome for the SEC championship?  I think we have a winner.  Call if you actually watched it.

Tennessee grade = B  Kentucky grade = C                                                                                                          Kentucky 36 Tennessee 49 – This was a well played game.  Sorry the votes are already in.  Both teams tried to turn their seasons back around for a remarkable end in Atlanta or New Orleans.   Bundle up for Nashville and Shrevport.

Georgia grade = A  Auburn grade = C (as in Cruz who disappoints before the big game)                                      Auburn 7  Georgia 13 – Wow in a strong showing of the red clay state the Dawgs voted to quit getting embarrassed at home and beat what we all thought was a good or maybe great Auburn team.  Auburn had a chance to beat Bama and get into the CFB playoffs.  Return to your safe place near Opelika Tigers.  There is no place for safety in the Capstone campus.  The Chubb - Michel ticket is rising to resurrect UGA to a possible 8-4 season.                   Nobody saw this coming.

Vanderbilt grade = F   Missouri grade = C                                                                                                             Vanderbilt 17  Missouri 26 – In this day of social media and internet hoaxes I ask did this game actually happen?

LSU grade = A   Arkansas grade = F                                                                                                                            LSU 38  Arkansas 10 – Coach Ogeron has the LSU Tigers as the 2^nd best team in the SEC West.  I never knew I would compare Coach O to Hillary.  Strange season.  Arkansas call me when you  get back from your therapist.  Are you Napoleon or Pee-wee Herman? 

Ole Miss grade = A Texas A&M grade = D (Like George Dukakis)                                                                              Ole Miss 29  Texas A&M 28 – Coach Hugh Freeze be like all Ronald “Maximus” Reagan and such and shook up Rebel Nation and said “Tear down this redshirt”.  Good move Hugh “Gipper” Freeze.   Young #20 Shea Patterson might keep you from being the best 6-6 team in the country and raised your bowl stock.  Texas A&M received a strong grade of  D.  They are a footnote in history.  Their D was earned by being a George Dukakis. They thought they had a chance for the big prize when they were # 4 for the playoff race just 8 days ago.  Texas A&M will be in the dust-bin of CFB history like George Dukakis who thought he could whip Reagan’s vice- president George Herbert Walker for the office of president in 1988.  Those memories of a #4 playoff ranking for the Aggies were swept away by Ole Miss like Reveille’s dandruff combed out by the their corps of cadets.   

It is just a game.  But it feels great when your team comes back or your ranked rival goes down.  Enjoy the rest of the fall.  Serve Jesus.  Make Jesus name great on this planet.  It will be one day.

Lift Jesus Up!

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Fletcher Law

SEC PROGRESS REPORT WEEK 10 Saturday October 5, 2016 Fall Fashion Edition

We are way past labor Day and heading to Turkey Day.  Let’s see what we look like.

Ole Miss grade = B -

Georgia Southern 27  Ole Miss 37  -  The Rebs played it so cool that they forgot to wear their full uniform as they forgot to wear the trade-mark grey pants that Walter Payton once said he dreamed of wearing.  The practice white pants set the tone for the Rebs/Black Bear's lack of enthusiasm.  The classically dressed Georgia Southern were the only ones in appropriate attire.  Even Coach Freeze forgot to shave.  Ole Miss almost got “South ALABAMAED” but woke up in time barely like an ATO with a Friday 8:00 A.M. class after a night at the Warehouse of old.

Texas A&M grade = F

Mississippi State grade = A+

Texas A&M 28  Mississippi State 35 – It was “little brother versus little brother” from the visiting state of Texas and the home of the Mississippi SEC team that is not the FLAGSHIP.   
The “Doppelgänger Bowl was bewildering.  To those from College Station or Starkghanistan  

-  From Wikepedia (You remember that word from college)   

"Doppelgänger In fiction and folklore,a doppelgänger or doppelga(e)nger (/ˈdɒpᵊlˌɡɛŋə/ or /-ˌɡæŋə/; German: [ˈdɔpəlˌɡɛŋɐ]  literally "double-goer") is a look-alike or double of a living person, sometimes portrayed as a paranormal phenomenon, and is usually seen as a harbinger of bad luck. In other traditions and stories, they recognize one's 'double-goer' as an evil twin."

Mississippi State wisely knew it needed more “Cow Bell” and less of the hideous maroon they got stuck with in uniform choices once upon a time.  This completely bamboozled the visiting “little brothers” from Texas and they went from number 2 in their state and number 4 in the playoff poll and "Aggied" it all over Starkghanistan. 

 

Vandy grade = c+

Auburn grade =B-

Vandy 16  Auburn 23 – Vandy almost got it done.  They are doing marvelous things with their “anchor” on their headgear.  Gold and black are hard colors to make look good on any uniform because - your colors are gold and black.  Auburn kept it tight with their classic uniform.  Auburn has been rolling.  They sputtered this week.  I hope Georgia does not have to go disguising themselves for the visiting Gus Bus as the Plainsmen/Tigers/War Eagles pile out to run up the score.

Florida grade = F

Arkansas grade = A+

Florida 10  Arkansas 21  - Florida is making the SEC a basketball conference.  Who can wait to see that boring offense roll up to the Georgia Dome to get rolled by the Tide.  The Gator offense makes Mitt Romney look exciting.  Arkansas is a little schizophrenic in their uniform choices of late. Like anyone with good taste they completely took out all the maroon they could from their Pig suits.  The small brained reptiles were also easily bamboozled. Advantage Razorbacks with a fashion gaff that worked….. this time.

Missouri grade = F

South Carolina grade = B

Missouri 21  South Carolina 31 – South Carolina looked confused as they did not mix and match well.  Mizzou has the hardest to figure out decals on their helmets.  Are you Tigers or are those chicken feathers? Repeat – Uniforms are for tradition and for your team to be easily identified.

Tennessee grade = A

Tennessee Tech  0  Tennessee 55 – How much did it cost to get paid to attend this game?

Georgia grade = B

Kentucky grade = C

Georgia 27  Kentucky  24 -  The Dawgs went classic in their road look and back to using Nick Chubb and Sony Michel to rush for over 200 yards.  The Cats stepped up with chrome headgears but the checkerboard  sleeves went out with racing season and plus it looks like Rocky Top envy. 

Alabama grade = A

LSU grade = B

Alabama 10  LSU 0 – Classic uniforms versus classic uniforms.  Manly football versus manly football.  Thank you teams for looking good and playing good..

It is not only football fashion season but also the political season as well.  Be nice to your neighbors, vote and then relax and have fun.  Don’t worry so much about who will be president. Jesus is forever King of kings and lord of lords. 

Lift Jesus Up!

Fletcher

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SEC Progress Report week 10 October 29: Trick or Treat Edition or Life in the SEC EAST

So far everything is as usual in the SEC West.  Bama is too good.  LSU is playing host to Bama.  The “lathered up” Cajuns, that idoloze Coach O, are charming yet delusional.  Bama calls Baton Rouge/Red Stick little Tuscaloosa with better food.  Ain't scared. Bobby Boucher will be asking "Mama why them Bamers always destroying us in Tiger Stadium/Death Valley?   Momma gonna say "Where you been at all your life Little Bobby?"

In the SEC East all is the same except IT IS not and it scares me.  UT, GA, even UF stunk it up and UT won!  Cat-lanta might mean now Kentucky is gonna try to own the Georgia Dome in football like they used to in basketball.  (SEC football fans -  Their used to be a great sporting event in March called the SEC basketball tournament played in Atlanta - it was awesome-ask a Kentucky fan about it sometimes.)

Kentucky Grade = A+

Missouri Grade = F- (your killing the SEC curve)

Kentucky 35  Missouri 21 – UK is like Highlander.  You can’t kill them no matter how many cliffs they jump over.  Missouri is like ROAD KILL.  They are not even trying to get up. 

Florida Grade = C

Georgia Grade = F- (see Missouri for the same comments)

Florida 24  Georgia 10 – Florida played bad.  UGA felt sorry for them.  So the Dawgs did not use Isaiah McKenzie or Nick Chubb.  The Dawgs jumped off-sides to negate scoring drives.  One Dawg player jumped up off the ground to run over to taunt the UF punt return who just fumbled instead of recovering the fumble.   Coach John Wayne said it best –  “Life (the SEC)is tough.  It’s tougher when you’re stupid.”

Mississippi State Grade = C- ( see the Missouri, UGA grade comment)

Samford 41  Mississippi State 56 – MSU avoided the first F ever given for a winning team.  Mississippi State, Come on man!  You cant keep giving these small former NAIA and D-3  schools their greatest sporting event in school history. 

Auburn Grade = A

Ole Miss Grade =C-

Auburn 40 Ole Miss 29 – Auburn might be the 2^nd best team in the SEC.  They have a defensive line and a power running game.  Ole Miss has neither. Ole Miss is in free fall on defense.  Ole Miss plays like drag-racers.  They speed out and then slow down and get passed.  Strike 4 Rebs.  Are you even studying?  Are you trying to be the best 6-6 team in the country?  Please don’t, that is not cool.

Tennessee Grade = C
South Carolina Grade = A

Tennessee  21   South Carolina 24  – Pumpkin Orange never made their people so scared.  They had the SEC East locked down.  Tennessee let the South Carolina Gamecocks “Charlie Brown” them and snatch the football away before Tennessee/Charlie Brown before they got to enjoy the SEC East annual sacrifice to Bama called The SEC Championship Game.

Texas A&M Grade = B

New Mexico State 10 Texas A&M  52 – Come on man.  You did not even play the good New Mexico team. 

Be safe.  Enjoy fall and know Jesus is Lord!

Fletcher Law

SEC PROGRESS REPORT WEEK 8 Saturday 10/23/2016: If you ain’t named Bama you need to study harder

This series is now called SEC PROGRESS REPORT from SEC REPORT CARD

SOUTH CAROLINA Grade = C

UMASS 28  SOUTH CAROLINA 34 – UMASS once again proves the bottom of the SEC is not special.  The Fighting  Chickens uniforms and offense looked “straight outta 1975”.  Was it a throwback to Jim Carlen days and USC forgot to inform us? 

Alabama Grade = A+  Texas A&M Grade = human

Texas A&M 14  ALABAMA 33- We tried to pretend Alabama can be challenged.  Wow. 

Missouri Grade = F-  (MIZZOU - you sirs are now on double secret probation.  Please attend the Big 12 expansion future meetings.)

MIDDLE TENNESSEE 51  MISSOURI 45 – The teacher has always loved him some MITSU with Coach Rick Stockstill and Defensive Line Coach Tommy West.   SEC West teams do not get beat by non-conference teams this late in the year.  Ask Houston Nutt.  It is like a sorority girl at Ole Miss wearing white after Labor Day.  It is simply not done.

Arkansas Grade=F  Auburn = A+

ARKANSAS 3  AUBURN  56 - Arkansas in the spirit of Halloween is going from Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.   It’s the Pigs are like some gals the frat boys chase on Saturday night only to be shocked to see what she looks like in daylight on Monday after classes.  Auburn and Coach Gus Malzahn are going Trick or Treating  as a vampire.  They were killed but came back to life.  Danger Will Robinson, Ole Miss and Georgia and maybe even Bama?Auburn is the second best team in the conference and rising up.

Mississippi State Grade = C  Kentucky Grade = B

MISSISSIPPI STATE  38 KENTUCKY 40 – Thanks for playing hard gentlemen.  This was a job rescue game for both coaches.  You both could not win but may both get canned after the season.  The Cats were hanging  tougher than their previous progress reports  indicated.

Vanderbilt Grade = C

TENNESSEE STATE 17  VANDERBILT 35 – How were you losing to Teneessee State late into the first half?  Nerds fot some loving and spotlight for one week.  And as we recall from the classic Remember The Nerds, they cannot handle success.

Ole Miss Grade = F  LSU Grade = A+

OLE MISS 21  LSU  38 – Interim LSU Coach Ed Ogeron made a short stop as head coach of the Ole Miss Rebels and was accused of making them and Colonel Reb cry.  He is back at it as he again made Rebels/LandSharks/Tedddy Bears/ Star War Nerds cry.  Leonard Fournette was a poltergeist for Halloween as he channeled Bo, Hershel and Marcus Dupree and embarrassed what was supposed to be full growed men on the Ole Miss defense. 

Enjoy fall.  Play hard fair and square.  Enjoy life and serve Jesus!

Lift Jesus Up!

Fletcher Law

SEC PROGRESS REPORT WEEK 8 Saturday 10/23/2016: If you ain’t named Bama you need to study harder

This series is now called SEC PROGRESS REPORT from SEC REPORT CARD

SOUTH CAROLINA Grade = C

UMASS 28  SOUTH CAROLINA 34 – UMASS once again proves the bottom of the SEC is not special.  The Fighting  Chickens uniforms and offense looked “straight outta 1975”.  Was it a throwback to Jim Carlen days and USC forgot to inform us? 

Alabama Grade = A+  Texas A&M Grade = human

Texas A&M 14  ALABAMA 33- We tried to pretend Alabama can be challenged.  Wow. 

Missouri Grade = F-  (MIZZOU - you sirs are now on double secret probation.  Please attend the Big 12 expansion future meetings.)

MIDDLE TENNESSEE 51  MISSOURI 45 – The teacher has always loved him some MITSU with Coach Rick Stockstill and Defensive Line Coach Tommy West.   SEC West teams do not get beat by non-conference teams this late in the year.  Ask Houston Nutt.  It is like a sorority girl at Ole Miss wearing white after Labor Day.  It is simply not done.

Arkansas Grade=F  Auburn = A+

ARKANSAS 3  AUBURN  56 - Arkansas in the spirit of Halloween is going from Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.   It’s the Pigs are like some gals the frat boys chase on Saturday night only to be shocked to see what she looks like in daylight on Monday after classes.  Auburn and Coach Gus Malzahn or going Trick or Treating  as a vampire.  They were killed but came back to life.  Danger Will Robinson, Ole Miss and Georgia and maybe even Bama?Auburn is the second best team in the conference and rising up.

Mississippi State Grade = C  Kentucky Grade = B

MISSISSIPPI STATE  38 KENTUCKY 40 – Thanks for playing hard gentlemen.  This was a job rescue for both coaches.  You both could not win but may bothe get canned after the season.  The Cats were hanging  tougher than their previous progress reports  indicated.

Vanderbilt Grade = C

TENNESSEE STATE 17  VANDERBILT 35 – How were you losing to Teneessee State late into the first half?  Nerds fot some loving and spotlight for one week.  And as we recall from the classic Remember The Nerds, they cannot handle success.

Ole Miss Grade = F  LSU Grade = A+

OLE MISS 21  LSU  38 – Interim LSU Coach Ed Ogeron made a short stop as head coach of the Ole Miss Rebels and was accused of making them and Colonel Reb cry.  He is back at it as he again made Rebels/LandSharks/Tedddy Bears/ Star War Nerds cry.  Leonard Fournette was a poltergeist for Halloween as he channeled Bo, Hershel and Marcus Dupree and embarrassed what was supposed to be full growed men on the Ole Miss defense. 

Enjoy fall.  Play hard fair and square.  Enjoy life and serve Jesus!

Lift Jesus Up!

Fletcher Law

In Season and Out of Season - Share Jesus

I was in Publix tonight. I man calls everyone to listen to his announcement at the register at closing time. A public announcement in Publix. He said "The news won't tell you.Its on the websites. Sir do you know we are this (hand signal) close to nuclear war because of the president?" I try to be patient. I was selfish and thought "Why do we need to pay then?" I should have been caring and turned the conversation to Jesus. We can't pass up opportunities.          

2 Timothy 4:2(NLT) "Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching."

SEC Report Card Week 7 Mid Terms October 15, 2016: "Someones Got Some Splaining to do!”

Mississippi State Mid-Term grade = C-

Mississippi State 21  BYU 28   Mississippi State     SEC 1-2, all 2-4

Game day grade = C-; Mississippi State is asked what happened?  The SEC West is what happened.  They took on an unusual tough road test on a Friday and almost came through on a huge road win at BYU. 

Vanderbilt 17  Georgia 16

Vanderbilt  SEC 1-3, all  3-4   Mid-term = C-                                                                                                                                                                                   

Vanderbilt Game Day Grade C-; The Vandy nerds crammed for a test and dodged an F with an impressive gutty win that could turn the Commodore ship to above 500 and a bowl. Zach Cunningham, Vandy LB, thank you sir for playing football the SEC way.

Georgia Mid Term grade = C-  SEC 2-3, all  4-3  

Georgia Game Day Grade F;  Luke 12:48  “From everyone who has been given much, much will be required; and to whom they entrusted much, of him they will ask all the more.” Spiderman and one of the Busch presidents also quoted this.  Trust me the Bible is the source.   Dawg fans are told every year about how great our state high school football talent is.  And it is great. So? To find the problems from Saturday is like grabbing water with one hand.  Hey Nick Saban lost to Louisiana – Monroe in 2007 in his first year at Bama.  Kirby Smart can clean this mess up if given the time and he can handle the high pitched squeals of Dawg fans.  And yes that type of dawg is prevalent here and also starts with a b like bulldog.  

Alabama Mid-Term Grade= A+   SEC 4-0  all 7-0      

Tennessee Mid-Term Grade = B    Tennessee SEC 2-2 all 5-2

Alabama 49  Tennessee 10                           

Bama Game Day Grade =A+   These guys are going to be arrested for child (the rest of the SEC) abuse soon.                                                

Tennessee Game day Grade = C.                                                                                                                                          A once remarkable season is now looking Belk Bowlish.                 

Missouri 14  Florida 40 

Florida  Mid Term- Grade = A-   SEC 3-1  all 5-1                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Missouri   Mid-Term Grade = F            SEC 0-3 all 2-4

Florida Game Day Grade = A  The Gators are one of  the most boring  good students in class.  Mizzou is the kid in class whose parents never sign report cards or attend parent teacher meetings.

Southern Miss 10  LSU 45

LSU Mid-Term Grade B no C + for firing Les Miles  SEC 2-1 all 4-2

The Tigers lost their Tiger Mike VI who passed away last week.  Les Miles is gone.  They struggled with Southern Miss for too long if they expect to be the A student the fans an Ed Orgeron say they are.  If that is what I think he is saying.  If he can make Colonel Reb cry like he did in Oxford they will be what’s up next for Bama.  Their grade will rise to one LSU fans are convinced it should be.

                                        Salute to Zach Cunningham who plays football the SEC way